Awesome Venn Diagram

Compliments of a dear friend, Christy B...... uh....... I mean H.

Week 12

The little strauberry weighs about as much as half an ounce now, and the crown-to-rump length is about two and a half inches (roughly the size of a large plum — busily working his or her way through the whole produce department!). You should have seen Jason and I with our mini tape measurer in Acme… The produce lady thought we were nuts!

It’s hard to believe since I don’t look or feel all that much different, but the baby has more than doubled in size during the past three weeks!!! The fetal digestive system is beginning to flex its digestive muscle as it starts practicing contraction movements, a skill the baby will need after birth to push food through the digestive tract. The bone marrow is making white blood cells, which will one day help him or her fight infection once he/she’s out of my safe haven. The pituitary gland at the base of the brain has started producing hormoneswhich will enable him or her to make babies of his or her own in a couple of decades or so!

This week marks a turning point for baby Straub. At 12 weeks, the herculean task of developing new bodily structures is nearing an end as most of the baby’s systems are now fully formed. Now comes the maintenance phase, during which the baby’s systems continue to mature for the next 28 weeks and the organs get to work…. which still sort of grosses me out if I think about it too much… so I don’t.

I had my first maternity clothing issue this week… even though I’ve lost 15 pounds since I found out I was pregnant, I TOTALLY had an underwear issue the other night! I woke up in the middle of the night in so much pain because my underwear were DIGGING into my hip bones! I don’t know if my hips are already expanding or if it’s just my baby bump making them squeeze tighter around my hips or what but it was SO painful! I got up and changed into a pair of Jason’s soft & comfy boxer briefs and all I could think about as I was trying to fall back asleep was “these are SO comfortable!!! But they would totally bunch up in my jeans!” Why on earth don’t they make women’s underwear that comfortable & soft? Oh no… they reserve the goodies for the guys, as usual! For us, we get grannie panties, yarn that rides up the crack, elastic that digs into the crease of your thighs if you end up with the wrong brand/pair… I mean… come on! Can’t we think of something better than this?

I can’t believe I’m a week away from my second trimester already! What on earth!??

D.I.P.S.

What is DIPS, you ask? A very real and very severe condition known as Dumbness In Pregnancy Syndrome, and I have been afflicted!

I believe I failed to report this incident when it occurred, but nearly two weeks ago, on January 16th, I was on my way to the teen center (where I work on Friday’s)… when my car started making funny noises and I felt like I was starting to slow down even though I wasn’t pressing on the brake… I looked down at my speedometer and realized that I was COMPLETELY out of gas! I have NEVER done that! 90 year-old women and 17 yr old girls run out of gas…. and to top it all off, it was the coldest day of the year and I was stranded on the side of the road. I called my good friend and Teen Center co-worker, Steph, to come bail me out and of course THIS was the day she was realizing her phone may be broken… I could hear her but she couldn’t hear me… So I’m screaming into the phone and she keeps hanging up on me! Finally I just texted her and she came & found me! We went to the closest gas station and begged the guy to let me borrow his gas can… he gave us this dinky little oil funnel which we realized AFTER we started pouring that it wouldn’t work… because it just poured right onto the ground… all but that which the wind blew onto my sweatshirt.

With FREEZING HANDS, we continued to struggle to get gas into my car. McGuivers that we are, we found a gallon milk jug in my car and scissors in hers and we made our own “funnel” to get enough gas into the tank so that I could fill up. Gasoline is VERY cold…. When we got to the point where we were trying to close the gas can, our hands were so cold they didn’t even work anymore and we were like trying to turn the cap with our wrists. It was horrible. I wreaked of gasoline and had to take off my sweatshirt…. so then when I got to the teen center (which had no heat, btw, due to a broken heater) I had to go into the mall and buy a jacket so I wouldn’t freeze to death over the next 6 hours or so.

The reason I tell you this story is that it is merely one in a series of events of my recent stupidity and new-found ditzy-ness. Jason and I agreed that we must document these “episodes,” as they are quite amusing. I’ve been having brain issues since Christmas, but I’m just recently starting wanting to document them, as they’re getting progressively worse.

Today, I had another such moment…

My keyboard at work was dusty… and I wanted to clean it off. I spotted a can of what I thought to be the aerosol air spray cleaner… so I put the little straw into the top of the can, shook it up and proceeded to spray all over my keys… when it wasn’t coming out as air, I started thinking “what the heck??” So I shook it more and sprayed it away from my computer…. and it was still a stream of moisture, not air. Perplexed, I began to examine the can for directions that I may have forgotten or missed…. when I realized it wasn’t aerosol keyboard cleaner at all…

IT WAS WD-40 !!!!! WD-40!!!!! I had just drenched my keyboard (and subsequently my laptop screen) with grease! You’ve got to be kidding me!!! What makes it worse was that I BOUGHT THE WD-40 myself for my squeaky computer chair…. WHY, OH WHY ON EARTH did I think it was keyboard cleaner??? What is WRONG with me???

They TOTALLY look the same, don't they? Anyone could mix them up!

Week 11

Welp, it’s week 11 and the adorable little alien inside me is really starting to look human! (not that I can see it or anything… that’s just what ‘they’ say). The baby is about 2 inches long (or about the size of a kiwi) and weighs about a third of an ounce with a head about as long as the rest of the body! Can you imagine if that’s how all people still looked? HA! We’d all be top heavy, like the opposite of wee-bles! “Pee-ples wabble but they always fall!” Bear with me, I’m at work and I’m over-tired. :)

He/She is growing hair follicles (kinda like the kiwi!!!), has ears that are almost their final shape, a tongue and palate in the mouth and visible nipples!!! (So does mommy…. from down the street! Such weird things that happen to your body, I tell ya….). Fingernail and toenail beds are developing this week, so nails should start growing by next week! Hmm.. will baby have Daddy’s alien finger-toes or Mommy’s Fred-Flinstone stubble feet? I really can’t even say which one would be better…….. lol. Poor kid…

The baby’s body is straightening and his/her torso is lengthening. It has most likely started stretching, doing somersaults and forward rolls, although I won’t be able to feel that till the baby gets a little bigger. If it’s a boy, the testes are developing and if it’s a girl, the ovaries are developing! Very cool!

This may be a very strange thought, but I was watching a basketball game yesterday, thinking about the heartbeat and I had this all-consuming thought! There were just crowds and crowds of people in the stands and players on the court & benches and I was like man…. every single one of those people (with absolutely no exceptions) was in some woman’s belly! Unbelievable! Then I was thinking about ALLLLLLL the people that were at the inauguration on tuesday, and ALLLLLLLL of those people were inside a woman’s uterus. Everyone! I can’t really explain it… but was a very strange thought! It’s like when you’re walking home from school as a kid and totally zone out and realize you’re home already…. and you just forget (or take for granted) all your body had to do to get you there without you even thinking about it…. breathing, digesting calories & converting them to energy, muscle movements, BALANCING…. not to mention being on auto-pilot in your brain and just zombie-ing your way to your house! It was kinda like that…. like everyone knows babies come from mommies’ bellies……. but when you really look at an ENORMOUS crowd like that….. it’s a crazy thought!

The-theee-ttthee-thhhheeee-

theeeee-THAT’S ALL FOLKS!

Our Second Pre-Natal Visit!

Today we went for our second pre-natal appointment! Yay! This one was a good one! There’s a lot to tell so bear with me!

First of all, I lost 7 pounds… which, they say, is normal in the beginning due to lack of appetite. My blood pressure was 110/70 which is great!… all my pee tests came back good; no protein or sugar in my urine… all good.

The doctor said that we would try to listen to the baby’s heartbeat but that many times, they have trouble hearing the heartbeat until about the 12th week or so… So, she put the cold jelly on my belly and searched around for a couple seconds…she found my heartbeat (I guess in a vein or something…lol) and then shortly after, we heard a really strong and fast heartbeat! She said it was pretty strong and didn’t seem to have any trouble holding onto it after she found it so it seems the baby is already cooperative!!! The heartbeat was 170 and she said during week 12, a heartbeat anywhere from 110 to 180 is good… so we’re in week 10 with 170…. sounds like a strong heart! woo hoo!

It was so cool to be able to hear the heartbeat! It was sort of surreal because I remember wondering what that would be like years and years ago… how that must feel to hear a heart beating inside of you…. It definitely made it feel much more real and made me much more aware that there is a tiny human inside of me who has his/her own little heart! It also made me very very excited for the first ultrasound! Oh yeah, and the doctor told us that we could go to Build-A-Bear and buy one of their little recorders so that on our next visit, we can record the Doppler heart beat and then go back and put it in a little bear for our baby! What a cute idea!!!

After all this excitement, I had to have my blood drawn and I was a little nervous, as I usually get when I have to get a shot or have blood taken… but, the woman was asking me if I was okay and she said that I looked patchy… I figured my face just got a little red or something because I was tense but when I went to the bathroom to give them my pee, I realized that the whole right side of my face was patchy and there was a little red spot peeking through the collar of my tee-shirt and when I lifted that my WHOLE chest was broken out in hives!!! I was like WHAT ON EARTH IS THIS!!!!!!

So when I went back out, I showed the nurses and Jason and I was like “this has NEVER happened to me before… I’ve NEVER gotten hives!” I kept reassuring them that I felt fine… they were acting like I was about to pass out… I was just thinking “this is a really querky pregnancy thing….” and I explained to them that a huge part of my job is speaking in public and what am I going to do now? lol! If I’m randomly getting HIVES ALL OVER MY CHEST, NECK and FACE when I get the least bit nervous…. I’ll have to quit my job!

What a strange experience!

When we were checking out, the lady at the front desk made a HUGE fuss about what a GREAT JOB I did filling out all the paperwork they gave us. She said it’s been years since she’s gotten a set of paperwork that didn’t need to be corrected at all! She had me and Jason pick out lolli-pops as a reward for our “excellent work!” It was very amusing. When we got in the car, Jason commented about it and I said “yeah, it must make a huge difference to have patients who are out of high school with college degrees!” lol. I mean, how hard is it to fill out basic paperwork? She really hasn’t had a perfectly completed set in years? No wonder she was so excited!

Anyway, thanks for checking in! That’s our latest (albeit very exciting) news!

Week 10

Here we are; the post we’ve all been waiting for!!! WEEK 10! Why are we so excited for week 10? Well, because baby Straub is now the size of a STRAWBERRY!!! YAY! Perfect! (and we’re all excited because Momma Kris hasn’t updated the blog in “over 10 days”……..geez… I didn’t know I had such avid readers! I’ll have to hold myself more accountable so I don’t get anymore hate emails!) Haha…

I’m actually flattered and surprised that so many people have been reading this! I figured it would end up just being me and Jason and probably the Minters. lol. I do have to clear one thing up, though…. there has been speculation as to whose hand is holding these model fruits… and, I’d like to throw it out there that my arms are not that hairy. Plus, use your brains people… who’s the photographer in this gig? :) lol. Yes, mystery solved… Jason is our hand-model! I feel the need to share with you that he especially loves having sharpee on his hand for two days after we take each picture. I tell him I’m growing a human and it’s a small price to pay! No, he has fun doing the pictures too. He’s no scrooge.

So What to Expect has informed me that I should expect to be constipated, but don’t worry folks, I’m not… at least not yet. The baby is taking on human shape now, as bones and cartilage are forming and tiny indentations on the legs are developing which will be knees and ankles! (let’s pray the strawberry doesn’t get mommy’s crappy knees). The arms already have elbows and can flex already! Even though the arms are getting stronger, each one is only about the size of this number 1.

This is a very bony week… the tooth bud fairy is making her appearance as well, as the strawberry’s teeth are forming under the gums. The baby’s stomach is producing digestive juices, the kidneys are producing more urine (gross) and if the strawberry is a boy… he’s already producing testosterone!

I haven’t had an ultrasound yet and they tell me I won’t until I’m 18 weeks along unless something is wrong (bleeding, cramping, etc). I go in tomorrow afternoon for my blood work and second pre-natal appointment. Hopefully we can listen to the dopplar or something to hear the baby’s heartbeat.

Keep praying for us! That we’re creating the healthiest little bugger possible! I’ve been so exhausted and have “episodes” where I literally cannot stay awake for another second and I crash (even at work). Jason has been so awesome taking on so many of the household things I used to be so on-top-of. Just a couple more weeks and I’ll be in my second trimester and will hopefully wake up.

Stay tuned, it’s almost week 11!

BARACK ATTACK!

Week 9

I can’t believe how fast these weeks seem to be flying by!

Right about now, the baby is about the size of a large grape/green olive/or grape tomato! The baby’s head has straightened out and is more fully developed. His/her ears are becoming more prominent (I wonder whose he/she will have!!!). Pigment has formed in the retinas of the baby’s eyes (hopefully blue!!!) and bone cells are starting to form. The liver, spleen, and gall bladder are forming and the baby is making spontaneous movements of his/her arms & legs because it’s tiny muscles are beginning to develop!!!

No wonder I’m so tired!!!!!!!

This week, we will celebrate the baby’s first graduation! Baby Straub is no longer an embryo, but is now a fetus!!! yay!

Back to work...

Ugh. It’s my first day back… nobody was wearing any nasty perfumes yet today, but they were drinking coffee! YUCK! I had to walk out of my boss’ office. Luckily, he’s a great guy (with 3 kids) so he understands! He just laughed at me as I finished my conversation with him from the hallway.

I had a pop-tart and a lot of water for breakfast…. I think baby Straub likes pop-tarts! Baby Straub does NOT like coffee!

Week 8

According to our calendar, we should now be in week 8 of our pregnancy! (2 months already!) It doesn’t seem right that you find out you’re pregnant and all the sudden you’re 2 months in already!!!

Baby Straub isn’t quite Strawberry-sized yet! He/She is closer to the size of a raspberry! (Still very big in comparison to a couple weeks ago!). His/her lips, nose, (tiny & very thin) eyelids, legs, and back are continuing to take shape. He/she is looking less like a reptile and more like a human! (good thing….)…although the fingers and toes are still webbed. The baby must be excited about something because his/her heart is beating about 150 times a minute! (about twice as fast as mine!!!) Maybe that’s why I can’t seem to sleep for more than 4 hours at a time but ALWAYS want to sleep!

The baby should start making tiny movements this week as he/she twitches his/her little trunk and arm & leg buds! Very exciting!!!

Daddy is still taking very good care of mommy… she’s tired ALL the time and is completely worthless around the house (especially in the kitchen…gag!).

I took off from work today because I’m getting over a cold and am so tired and knew I wouldn’t make it through the day. Tomorrow should be my first day back since I came home in tears on the 29th! Wish me luck! Hopefully no one is wearing perfume